再死

昨天的我死了，
不知道什么时候会重生。
今天的我即将死亡，
也不知道什么时候会重生。
我每天死一次，
当我金刚护体不再每天死的时候，
那代表我重生了！

我不知还要死多少次。。。

死

上一次失眠，泪流不止已经是好几年前的事，
痛过，哭过，
现在的我已免疫。
这一次，
我很想停住眼泪，
可是泪水却不自觉的泛滥。
就让它们流吧！
哭过后，
我就会金刚护体，
再也不会有任何感觉！
总要痛过才能学乖！

不要怪我冷酷无情，
我只是失去了知觉！

Waves

I miss Aussie's beaches very much,
they have pretty jetties,
and most importantly,
they have pretty jetties with nice and big sunshine!
Although I can reach Port Dickson by an hour drive,
I just can't feel the same feeling!
I always remember how great the sun was in Fremantle,
boats by the sea,
great weather,
peace.
I always remember how pretty Glenelg is,
Starbucks by the jetty,
people fishing and diving,
and also the path for walking along the cost line,
cold and windy but peace.

I need something to make myself peace,
I only live in my own world,
and I like sunshine and beach.
Hence,
I want to go to beach with beautiful sunshine for a peaceful life in my small little world!

Don't bother

I am currently seeing a skin specialist for my problematic face,
doctor asked for my family history, job, and all other questions that might possibly cause pimples to pop out.
Doctor actually said that stress is one of the reasons of causing my problem,
I actually have a little doubt,
where does stress come from?
why am I feeling stres?
what causes stress?
Pei said that stress might be refering to "thinking to much",
and she said I am always thinking too much!
Well yes,
I must confess,
somehow for some reasons and occasions,
I think very much.
Hmm...
maybe I should not say "think very much" but "worry very much",
I must learn to relax and let go.

Or maybe,
I just don't bother about anything!

显掉

我最近的口头禅是“显掉”。
每天上班下班都塞车 - 显掉。
就连周末出外走走也会碰上大塞车 - 严重显掉！
现在我一出门就是塞车 - 够力显掉！
看来唯有呆在家里看电视才不会显掉，
可是电视台常常会有不好看的节目 - 显掉，
一整天呆在家里看电视也很闷 - 显掉，
睡也不是吃也不是 - 严重显掉！
就连工作的时候也可以说是无所事事 - 够力显掉！

显掉！

heiress

Our(Pei, PK, and me) main topic this while is about our jobs and futures,
no matter where we go,
what we talk and share is about my jobs.
This morning when we were having dim sum in Sri Petaling,
PK asked when am I going to help my dad out in his business,
here's the answer...

When I was 16 or 17,
I asked my dad if he wants me to take over his business one day,
apparently my dad was shocked and surprised by my question.
He then said that he never wanted or thought of any of us to take over his business,
he understands and comprehends too many existing difficulties that neither him nor any of us may solve,
he knows what's the cons of being involved in this area.
He has always been telling us that his only hope is to see us working in a good company that pay us great amount of money,
and obviously,
he is happy with what I am doing now.
It's not about me being filial or not,
but those hidden difficulties and uncertainties that people besides my dad cannot forsee.

My filiality comes from what my parents want.

Big vexations

When I was young,
I cared very much about friends giving me gifts on my birthday,
I considered those who did not give me anything as not my best friends.
As I grow,
I found that wishes are more than simple and enough,
my friends do not have to waste their money to buy me something,
or use their brain juice to think about what to buy.
Also,
I don't have to worry about how to "settle" presents given by them.
I mean most of time,
people will give me what I don't really use or wear,
I don't mean that their gifts are not worthy,
but that I just don't use them so often,
and eventually those gifts or presents will just become part of the dust.
So now,
for minimising my vexations,
I'd rather people send me wishes,
at least I know you are remembering my day.

Thanks everyone for sending me wishes and minimising my vexations!

Rotten Egg Day

It's rotten egg's birthday!
Come on,
let's send her wishes,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY EGG!

PK is very cute,
she MSN-ed me and asked "today is her birthday?"
I replied "abuthen?"
PK then asked "what's the time now in Perth?"
I said "Egg is in Adelaide!"
PK "Oh, what time is it in Adelaide now?"
I was like "what? that's your friend for 20 years! you can't even remember her birthday? you can't even remember where she is?"
PK,
are you too busy working or something?
The rotten egg will be very upset by your reaction,
say sorry to her!

To those who has not wished the super blur rotten egg,
please send your wishes ASAP!
I sent mine long long time ago!
Egg,
please anticipate my wish!

ASPD

Perhaps I am too self-centered,
I don't feel like "dealing" with people.
I live in my own world and I don't want to be bothered,
I don't like to social with new people,
and sometimes I get so lazy to get in touch with old friends.
You know when there is people, there is conflicts,
I just don't want to spend my time and brain juice solving conflicts,
I don't feel like dealing with anyone!
Trust me you won't understand the power of conformity,
and I always wanted to avoid it after seeing its power,
and this might probably be one of the reasons why I don't want to "deal" with people!
I won't change myself to fit into a group of people or adjust myself to become one of the members of a particular group,
nor wanting or asking people to change themselves to fit me.
If you are down with me,
great,
we may become close friend.
Otherwise,
I would rather live in my own world.

I quickly check on my Abnormal Psychology text book to see if I have antisocial personality,
(you know I always like to "diagnose" myself),
I am not qualified in any single symptoms of Antisocial Personality Disorder!
Relief!

cis!

Raya holiday is officially ended but I am still in high-stress condition!
One of my colleagues is on holiday and I will have to back her up,
I have been working since the last 2 days although I should be on holiday as well.
Jobs keep coming in these few days although we have told all our clients that we will be on holiday for 2 days,
bosses are "seeing" us that we will definitely have to revert all requests ASAP without delay,
I start wondering what kind of job am I working?
Those clients are so not considerate that they knew we are on holidays and they still want us to revert their requests,
not one or two,
but more than three everyday.
I really want to question them "what do you think if I bug you with 10 e-mails per day when you are on your X'mas holiday?"
I think they won't even check their mailbox!
Well,
what comes around, goes around,
we shall see what they would encountered in the future!

Cis!