闭关

爱过一次，元气大伤！
之前伤的太严重，
住进ICU整整超过5年。
这一次，
元气越来越弱，
且远远超乎我的想象，
就连我自己也不懂自己怎么了，
就快控制不住了！

元气大伤，闭关中，勿打扰！

cheerful and optimistic

I have been having negative energy with me since last Saturday,
this is not a good sign,
I have bad temper,
I am not doing my job professionally,
I show "shit face" to everyone,
my mood swing easily,
I could be smiling to you, but deep inside of my heart I am feeling bad,
etc. etc.
I know this is bad,
and I need to move on from this.
I talk to PK,
I listen to her,
I try not to be self-oriented,
and that works!
I just need to remain cheerful and optimistic!

5 days

I never stop talking with you for more than 3-4 days,
and it's now 5 days!
Saturday
*
Sunday
*
Monday
*
Tuesday
*
Wednesday
*

Somehow I am going mad!

不只有一点动心

我和你男和女
都逃不过爱情
谁愿意有勇气
不顾一切付出真心
你说的不只你
还包括我自己
该不该再继续
该不该有回忆
让爱一步一步靠近
我对你有一点动心
却如此害怕看你的眼睛
有那么一点点动心
一点点迟疑
不敢相信我的情不自禁
我对你有一点动心
不知结果是悲伤还是喜
有那么一点点动心
一点点迟疑
害怕爱过以后还要失去
难以抗拒
人最怕就是动了情
虽然不想不看也不听
却陷入爱里
我和你男和女
都逃不过爱情
谁愿意有勇气
不顾一切付出真心
你说的不只你
还包括我自己
该不该再继续
该不该有回忆
让爱一步一步靠近
我对你有一点动心
却如此害怕看你的眼睛
有那么一点点动心
一点点迟疑
不敢相信我的情不自禁
我对你有一点动心
不知结果是悲伤还是喜
有那么一点点动心
一点点迟疑
害怕爱过以后还要失去
难以抗拒
人最怕就是动了情
虽然不想不看也不听
却陷入爱里
我和你男和女
都逃不过爱情
也许应该放心
让爱一步步靠近

失落。。。
我对你应该不只有一点动心~~~

三种人

你叫我DD，
我说：“DD是你叫的咩？”
你说：“可以啦，一样的。”
我说：“不要，不可以，不喜欢！”
你说：“ok ok，我叫你D啰。”
我说：“不要，不可以，不喜欢！”
你说：“ok ok。”
......
其实我不太喜欢人家叫我DD，
只有我公司里那些pronounce不到我名字的人为了方便而叫我DD，
久而久之大家都开始叫我DD了。
我把认识我的人分成3种，
第一种叫我沁耘，
这一种人跟我最为熟悉，
我也最爱他们。
第二种人叫我Chinn Yun，
他们是我college里的同学，
大家也只是同学，
久没联络了。
称呼我Deidre的人一定都只是工作上的需要，
我对这群人没什么太强烈的好感，
明显的也比较疏远。

所以你知道为什么我不要，不喜欢，也不可以让你叫我DD。

想你是临睡的习惯

今天只做一件事，
想你~~~
:D

寂寞是临睡的习惯
习惯是一个人守着
冰冷的床和烟灰缸
没有你的孤单
想你在这样的夜晚
打开窗吹着冷风
故意把灯关上
试着想像你笑的模样
不懂我的爱在你生命中
占据多少份量
让你哭泣却是我心深处最痛的伤
最残酷的惩罚
i will never try to break your heart
我不愿这样
让爱情不由自主
陷入一场
两败俱伤的战
i will never try to break your heart
我真的不想
再面对没有你的寂寞夜晚
烟雾迷茫的孤单

Experiences

I read some of my old posts,
and I am amazed by myself (in a good way),
I seriously can't understand nor remember how could I write those posts!
I mean I am so surprise with the words I used,
and those words actually contributed to quite some number of meaningful posts!

We just need experience in order to write meaningful posts!

superman forever

So happen I was talking with my dad something about the insurance,
and dad started a conversation about what I should remember about the insurance, investment...etc next time when he is not here.
I feel a little reluctant to talk about this with dad,
it is like he is going to leave us forever.
I mean we know he can't be with us forever,
but this is not the time yet,
he is still very much needed.
I know dad started to prepare everything for us since the day we were born,
although people used to laugh at him (saying how silly he was to prepare everything for us since the first day we are born),
that didn't stop him,
he just do whatever he thinks is good for us,
and indeed,
he is always right!
Dad's preparations make us think that it is enough to have him,
we could just have our hands off!

With such a great dad,
I have very high standard in judging men,
and that is one of the reasons why I claim myself to be satu orang oriented.

Another Day

Lie to me, say that you need me
That's what I wanna hear
That is what, what makes me happy
Hoping you'll be near
All this time, how could I know
Within these walls, I can feel you

Another day goes by, will never know just wonder why
You made me feel good, made me smile
I see it now, and I, can say it's gone
That would be a lie
Cannot control this, this thing called love

You must think, how can this be
You don't really know me
I can't tell, this ain't the time
You'll never be mine
What can I say, something 'bout my life
I just lost again

Another day goes by, will never know just wonder why
You made me feel good, made me smile
I see it now, and I, can say it's gone
That would be a lie
Cannot control this, this thing called love

Always have to move on,
To leave it all behind
Go along with time

Another day goes by, will never know just wonder why
You made me feel good, made me smile
I see it now, and I, can say it's gone
That would be a lie
Cannot control this, this thing called love

~~~Lene Marlin~~~

disappear

Everything has just gone so wrong,
and I am not in the mood to say anything.

Ming disappeared for quite some times but she is up now,
it's my turn,
I am gonna disappear for awhile.

Do not try to bug/ping me.